Back to Square One

When Dave and I were first married, it became immediately obvious that I needed to be in charge of the finances. As my FIL enjoyed pointing out, I didn't contribute anything (if you remember, our marriage and Dave's retracted promise to move to Arizona meant that I had to drop out of grad school and move back to OK-I was four months pregnant by the time I got back and while I interviewed for a few teaching positions-it's no surprise that no one was excited to hire someone headed into her second trimester). However, when Dave paid the bills, they didn't so much get paid and I got angry phone calls at home. When I took over, bills got paid. I wasn't seeking to 'emasculate' my husband, just to improve our credit score and I did. While he was in Bosnia, I paid off a LOT of our debts and really got us into such a good place financially that  by the time Elisa was born I let Dave take over because having four kids ages six and under AND working towards a Master's Degree was as much as I could handle.

A month ago, I returned to stay-at-home status. I've spent most of that month getting the house organized. And, I've fielded a few angry phone calls. Yesterday, we got a certified letter telling us we were two car payment behind and that our loan was in default. Today, I took back over the finances. That was not a pleasant way to start my day. Apparently, we are broke-ety, broke, broke, broke notwithstanding yet another line-of-credit loan that was apparently opened without my consultation. My morning prayer pretty much consisted of..."Dear God, I'll spare you the finer details of our bank balance and I'll spare my husband's life, just please HELP ME FIX THIS ALL OVER AGAIN!" Needless to say, I could go on about this at length, but I just don't have it in me to say more than I already have. The bottom line is, I do know what to do here to make things right. I've done it before...I'm just mad that after everything I put into making us solvent in the early years, I get to start all over again. Sigh...At least now when feeling sad about missing FRED 2009, I will know that we really and truly didn't have the money for me to go anyway.