An Overdue Acknowledgement

A few weeks ago in the midst of 1st trimester ickiness and the usual four-kid chaos, I got a sweet comment from Georgie congratulating me on my nomination for the 2008 Okie Blogger Awards. (Congrats to you too, Georgie!) I was very touched. This is my third year to be nominated, and I am always very excited about it-even though I have as yet been the eternal Okie Blogger bridesmaid and have yet to win. Nonetheless, I have met some of my favorite people (and still hope to meet a few more someday) as a result of these awards and I am honored yet again to be included in their numbers. This year, I am nominated for Best Commentary and Best Inspirational blog. I've got some pretty impressive competition. If you are an active Okie blogger, I invite you to check out all the nominees for this year and if you are so inclined, feel free to vote for me! Though I do love being a bridesmaid. Voting is open through February 7th!

Happy Birthday Caroline!

This is usually where I would post my favorite pictures of my little 7 year-old. Sadly, my best pictures are on the back-up CD still waiting to be uploaded back to the laptop. (When a pop-up window tells you to click on it and make sure your computer is virus-free, DON'T. Sometimes, those pop-ups don't want to help you, they want to actually GIVE your poor laptop a virus. Can't believe I fell for that one. I knew better once upon a time, I promise.) Anyway, in lieu of cute photos, here is one of many favorite Caroline memories:

When she was 4 weeks-old, she caught RSV because her older brother and sister had mild colds. It quickly turned into pneumonia and she was rushed to the hospital in respiratory distress when she was just a month-old. She was in there for almost a week and her stay included an incident during which she almost choked to death right in front of me. (Thank God Dave was once EMT certified and knew EXACLTY what to do, because I froze.) Needless to say, I felt as if I'd aged 5 years in the 5 days she spent in her little oxygen tent. The day we brought her home was the first that I'd been able to hear anything without the roar of an oxygen compressor in the background, the first that I'd been able to hold her without worrying about dislodging her IV or knocking off the leads that monitored her heart and her blood/oxygen saturation level, and the first that I'd been able to take off the little newborn shirt and hat and put her back in one of those cuddly pink little sleepers that suited her blonde fuzzy head and big blue eyes so much better. As her nurse disconnected everything and handed her to me to dress for the ride home, I felt my body almost melt with relief after four very tense and scary days of wait-and-see and I must have smiled in the process because when I looked down at little Caroline, she was beaming back at me with her very first real baby smile. It was beautiful.

(And the memory of that smile has saved her little rear-end from trouble more often than she will ever know.)

Happy Birthday Caroline!!

This is One Small Town

When I was a kid, Soonerville really was a small town. But it has since ballooned to a population of almost 100,000. And yet, so many small town elements still remain here. Earlier this morning, I checked the liveblog of a local news station for road condition updates. Instead, I noted with some chagrin that a high speed chase had come to an end at a local RV dealership about a mile from my house and that two of the three suspects were still at large. While I wasn't really all that worried about them getting up and down the two icy hills leading to my house (not to mention managing to get past my frozen driveway and overly friendly dog), I did monitor the situation closely as did my friend Wendy who lives on the other side of the highway. We chatted and joked about back and forth about it via Facebook all morning. Then, I clicked on the local ABC affiliate to watch the news mostly because the news is followed by All My Children. (There are some things you just never outgrow.) And that's when they dropped the name of one of suspects. And Wendy and I (and many of our other friends) definitely know him. Of course we do. It's Soonerville. And also, it's kind of funny. But probably because I wasn't the one who got tazed in a trailer today after stealing a truck and fleeing from the police. Or maybe that was funny too. At least until the tazer got involved. Oh well, never a dull moment. Right?

*Edited to add that, yeah, that's him. Sad.*

Ice Days

We are currently homebound thanks to an ice storm that started Monday and seems to have ended this evening. The kids had school Monday, but are off today and will still be home tomorrow. This seems to drive most people crazy, but I kind of like having all of us together under one roof. (The kids might have different feelings, though.) I'm also enjoying all the extra rest and co-parenting as Dave's work has been closed as well. In just a few more hours it will be the first full 24 hours since the first part of December that I haven't been nauseous or had a headache. While I learned long ago not to place any bets, I am at that place on the calendar where I just might be seeing the end of the morning sickness. Or so I hope...

Week In Review

Reading-

Emma by Jane Austen-

I took Tracy's advice and skipped the rest of the introduction (not originally part of the book) and am thoroughly enjoying my reading. It turns out four kids and a pregnancy haven't destroyed my brain or my ability to enjoy a good book nearly as much as I feared they had.

Watching-

Battlestar Galactica-

Since this week's episode is, as yet, unwatched all I can say is last week's episode posed more questions for me than it answered. Reading some of the interviews with directors and actors leads me to believe I may not be as satisfied with the end of this series as I would like to be. In a note that is only a spoiler if you haven't seen it, am I the only one who laughed at the futility of Gaeta yelling for a medic? It was SO too late for that.

Jon and Kate Plus 8-

There was a marathon last week and I finally saw the wedding episodes in Hawaii. They were cuter than I care to admit. I can say the same for the show. Also, I can now recognize each kid by photo and name them even if the pictures aren't labeled. Sad.

Grey's Anatomy-

First of all, Eric Stoltz rocks in every role he's given, so I'm not surprised he was brilliant on this show too. Last Thursday's episode of Grey's was a LOT more like the show I remember than it has been in the last couple of seasons. I hope it's a continuing trend. I also hope George stays. I miss him.

A Very Duggar Wedding-

I cannot explain my fascination with this show, but I was impressed at how beautiful their wedding was. Dave was amused by all the car-trashing antics and the brother sprinting out of the church for the ring. I think boy humor must be universal.

At the Movies-

Mamma Mia!-

OK, so the stage musical has a lot more singing and dancing talent. The movie is still very fun. My girls have talked me into watching it twice in the last week. The jokes and innuendo fly right over their heads and they sure are cute dancing and singing along with the show. I'm glad there was already ABBA on my iPod because that's all they want to hear in the car right now.

Out and About-

Girls Night In-

Caroline and Elisa were sick most of the week, so even though they were well in time for a Friday sleepover, we just went for a few hours instead. The mom hosting it is one of my favorite people at the kids' school and we had a great visit while the girls (and Tristan since Dave was at work-poor boy) ate pizza, played games, and made lots of noise. It was good to be out of the house-and it's not easy right now to get me to leave unless it's for work or to drop off/pick up the kids.

Circle the State with Song-

I remember this being a big deal when I student taught at a local middle school so I felt a little old when Natalie was able to participate this year. I guess I'm more involved in my community than I thought because it seemed like I recognized half the names on the program. Natalie was sulky at first about "giving up my ENTIRE Saturday," but enjoyed being a part of it by the time it was over and apologized for her attitude which had been considerably annoying that morning before she left. Part of me wants to sigh and say I should get used to it and part of me doesn't think she should talk to ANY adult like that, particularly the one who gave birth to her.

Sabbath Day of Rest?

So far today, I've spoken in Sacrament meeting, kept four kids in line for 30 minutes in the car so that Dad could go into the church office and help count tithing (that'll teach me to try to save gas and not take up extra parking spaces with a second car), and assisted with training two newly called YW presidencies in Norman. All in a Sabbath day's work, right?

"Is That...the Baby?"

So, I had my first diagnostic ultrasound on Thursday. I've only had one other early ultrasound done and it was at about 8 weeks pregnant with Tristan to verify a heartbeat after a scary weekend of spotting. It turned out (obviously) that he was just fine and I remember seeing a little gummy bear looking blob wiggling around its little stumps that would eventually become arms and legs. And so, I was expecting more of the same at 12 weeks. Maybe a bigger gummy bear, maybe slightly longer arms and legs, but not much else. I was irritated that, thanks to the 24-hour fever free rule at school, Caroline and Elisa were with us. For one, I had it in the back of my mind that something might be wrong and I didn't want them there if that was the case. Also, even if everything was fine, that they wouldn't really even be able to tell there was a baby in there. But, I had no place else to leave them, so there they were in the exam room with me. Having read this, you can imagine my shock when these were some of the first things I saw once the ultrasound began (and prompted my question in the title):

That is a real live baby in there. It kicked, it rolled around, it even sucked its thumb as you can see in the picture just above here. And, just like that, the idea of a new baby became a reality. This little thing that has been making me tired and sick and is changing all my carefully-made plans with its mere existence is more than just a usurper, it is an actual person in there. Sadly, this realization hasn't lessened my nausea or headaches, but it has made living with those things much more bearable. And the girls...they absolutely knew what they were seeing. (And now my older kids are mad that they missed it. Oh well. There will be more.)

P.S. All the measurements looked good. Yay!

An Open Letter to my Husband's Employer

Dear AFB located in the Metro area-

Are you trying to kill me? First, you gave my husband this entry level job when he was 25 and should have been finishing college. You made the money and the benefits sound so good that he promptly dropped out of school so that he could screw bolts in and out of his engines for the rest of his life until, like his Dad, his body gets so completely wiped out from years of manual labor that you can retire him on the smallest amount of money possible. In order for him to keep this all-important sacred job (that will ultimately kill him, I suspect), I dropped out of a very prestigious Master's program at the University of Arizona so that we could raise our daughter under one roof instead of two states apart. Three kids later, we are still stuck here in Oklahoma, the one place I swore I would never spend my adult years. (And if I had it to do over, I would be raising Natalie as a single mom in Tucson. I can say that with absolute surety now.)

During that time, you've made his work situation miserable, but his pay and benefits just good enough to compel him to stay. You passed him over for a promotion that he was not only qualified for but also highly desired for because his supervisor decided he would "be damned if some kid got to move up to the office after he (the supervisor) spent his whole life on the 400 line." (That was John Q, by the way. The one who died three days after he retired. I didn't ask God to do that, but I sure did thank him when it happened. Possibly the only death of a human being for which I found myself incapable of feeling even one tiny bit sorry. *Lest you think I'm overly harsh, he did this to any younger employee eligible for any promotion that he, himself was unqualified for and also, he had two girlfriends behind his wife's back. Again, I'm not sorry he dropped dead so suddenly rather than getting to savor his "golden years."*) As your employee, I've heard him get spoken to in a manner that is just slightly above how one would speak to a child. I've watched him get taken advantage of repeatedly because he is such a nice guy. But this? THIS is the last straw.

You may be unaware that I am expecting our 5th child. This means I have four other elementary and pre-school aged children at home. Rather than having morning sickness, I have it in the evening. The nausea starts at about 2:30 and is followed by a migraine at about 5:00. At first, this was acceptable because I could get up, get myself and the kids ready, take them to school, go to work, and pick up the kids all before I started feeling truly horrible in earnest. And when that happened, it was always just about the time my husband came in from work. And then...even though you don't have enough people during the day shift anyway, you mandatorily bumped my husband to working nights. Our house has gone to crap because I cannot clean while suffering from a migraine and either throwing up or feeling like I'm about to constantly from 5 p.m. until I wake up miraculously restored the next morning. My husband never sees his children because they leave while he is sleeping and come home after he has left for work. This means I have to take complete care of them and, frankly, I can barely take care of myself right now. I am now constantly exhausted and sick and have missed one more day than usual at my job every week since he switched shifts which in stressful to me and my employer, especially since I am part-time and paid only when I am at work.

And finally, to add insult to injury, you have taken the only two days of rest that I have (Saturday and Sunday) and, for the past two weeks, given him mandatory 10 hour shifts on both days. UNACCEPTABLE.

Remember what happened to John Q. when he screwed my family? I'm only praying for the same to happen to each and every one of you responsible

Back In Business

My laptop is fixed! Now...what to write about? Just when I thought my life couldn't get more complicated, I walked out to my driveway to find yet another flat tire this morning and when I came back in to tell Dave, Caroline started puking everywhere. Such is the glamourous life of a mom. Dave got the tire patched yet again while I sat at home with the little sickie. Since we didn't want to expose the kids in the carpool, Dave picked our kids up early, dropped them at home, and left for work. Little Miss Caroline seemed to rally enough in the early evening that I actually ventured to Blanchard for a speaking assignment. I came home just in time for another pukefest. Lucky me. (Though honestly, I'm glad it was me to deal with it and not any of the nice people who step up and help with the kids so I can leave from time to time in the evening if needed.) Poor Baby. All she wants to do is go to her Broadway Baby class tomorrow and I'm thinking all I won't do is expose the rest of her class to whatever it is she's likely going to pass to the rest of us by the end of the week. My question is, if a 12-weeks pregnant mom who is already nauseous 24/7 gets a stomach virus from her kids, will she really know the difference? (Kind of a rhetorical tree in the wilderness question-and yes, I already know the answer.) Nine more weeks of Dave's mandatory swing shift left to go...not that I'm counting the days or anything. If they mandatory yet another weekend though...I'm outta here.

Annoyed

Laptop is still down. It's not that it isn't an easy fix, it's just that no one has time to do it. Hopefully, I'll be up and running tomorrow because blogging from Dave's PC is just not the same.

A Couple of Things

1. My laptop is acting funny which is limiting my online time. I'll be back when it's up and running reliably again.
2. There was a Battlestar Galactica marathon on SciFi today leading up to the final season's premiere episode, so updating my blog tonight wasn't really going to happen anyway.

P.S. It sure was fun to call Dave (now working nights) and say things like "Oh my gosh! I wasn't expecting that!" "Ooh! Someone just died." "No...I won't tell you who."

P.P.S. Remind me not to say things like "that character is SO annoying, I wish they would just die." Because then, they do. It's happened twice now.

Why I Went Public

So, I was doing a pretty good job of keeping quiet about baby #5. My plan was to do this until I had heard a heartbeat (the usual defining moment for me in making a pregnancy "real"). But then, I had my first appointment with Dr. P. I thought there would be the usual paperwork, the routine tests, and some good-natured joking. And there was. There were also some frank discussions involving the phrases "age is now a factor," "possible amniocentesis," "other methods of testing." Apparently, you kick things up a notch when you have a baby after turning 35. I didn't think we would have these discussions quite so early in the pregnancy, though I knew they would eventually come up in conversation. It caught me a little bit off-guard. It actually makes sense because, in lieu of an amnio, I am doing blood-testing and an ultrasound at 12 weeks. When you see a woman the first time at 10 weeks, there are decisions that need to be made and appointments that have to be scheduled. And while I don't think there will be any complications, the process is just a little more daunting to me this time and we all know that while my DH is a great provider, he's not much of a hand-holder and I think I'm going to need that. And so, even though I have yet to see that reassuring heartbeat, much less hear it; this situation has already become real to me and I felt like it was time to share it with everyone else. If it all goes swimmingly, I'll have a lot of people excited with me at the early August finish-line. And if anything goes wrong, I won't be alone. So, welcome to the journey. Feel free to grab my hand.

TV Tuesday

I've got a very full schedule today, so here's my 'phone it in' post for the week. Recently, I bragged on Twitter about how my son followed an entire West Wing opening scene intently and even 'got' the joke at the end. Imagine our mutual joy when I found the scene on YouTube! So, here is Tristan's favorite West Wing blurb (it's funny even if you didn't follow the tv show):

Week In Review

Reading

Emma by Jane Austen-

I'm ashamed to admit that, one week later, I'm still working my way through the rather long Introduction written by an English Lit. professor. I was tempted to skip it because, well, it's 85 pages long. But, given that I'm reading this alone without the benefit of an English Lit. professor or even a book club, I don't want to miss any of the finer details of the story. I almost bought the Cliff Notes for the same reason. I've waited awhile to start reading Jane Austen and I want to appreciate properly and not just because I've seen the movie adaptations of many of her novels.

Watching

OU v. Florida

Seriously? I skipped a new Grey's for this? Oh well. It was a good game even if I didn't care much for the final score. Also, I think Texas should have been #2 and Utah St. #3 in the final poll because I just can't picture Utah St. beating Texas, even with their crushing of the Crimson Tide. But that's probably just my Big 12 bias talking. And if Mack had whined and bragged a little less, I think it actually might have happened that way too. (Oops! I guess my mistake tells you how much I know about the Mountain West football division. I really did watch the Utah/Alabama game, though, I promise. Granted, it was to cheer for the Tide...but you see how that worked for me.)

The Critics Choice Awards (warning: off-topic rant included in the recap)-

OK, Dave and I actually just watched it re-broadcast on VH-1 because we wanted to see the 'Angelina glare.' I didn't really think she looked that pissed, but maybe that's because I don't know her in real life. Nor would I want to, I'm Team Aniston. Apparently Brad and Angie can flaunt their relationship and children all over the media and that's just fine, but let Jen use the word "uncool" once in an interview or dare to break her four-year silence (which must have been a huge relief for her) and she's the bad guy in all of this? I don't get it. But I am amused by a lot of LDS mommy-bloggers who think because Brangelina have children, they are the relationship we MUST respect. Because clearly, if a man in a Utah ward left his fertililty-challanged wife* to shack up with a single mom with whom he proceeds to have three more children out of wedlock, they would side with THAT couple. Are you kidding me? Those women wouldn't even talk to that couple, unless it was behind their back. (Yes, I'm still bitter over the very small number of LDS blogrolls on which I'm actually included even though I know darn well that my blog doesn't belong there. But seriously, this LDS mom-blog trend of defending Brangelina? I find it very, very funny all things considered. Hey! I believe in the LDS gospel, that doesn't mean I have to live the culture.) But, I digress...and my main point is that as much as I would have loved to bust Ms. Jolie making an inappropriate face, I really didn't see it. And I was looking quite eagerly for it. On the flip side, I LOVE that Anne Hathaway is being taken seriously for her work-even though I loved all her princess movies too.

The Golden Globe Awards-

They haven't started yet, but we are READY! (Or, I am ready anyway. I think Natalie might get sucked in as well before the night is over.)

The West Wing Season 3-

This show rocks! Pres. Bartlett just got his censure and I just found that I loved Leo even more than I thought I could. (And yes, while I didn't watch the show as it aired, I do watch TV, so I know what happens towards the end of the series. Which is why it makes sense that it pretty much ended there.) I'm looking forward to the rest of this season's episodes and Season 4. Beyond that, I'm a little leery of different writers. However, there is John Goodman and Alan Alda to look forward to, so it can't be all bad.

At the Movies

North by Northwest-

I love the way our local PBS affiliate hosts classic movies on Saturday Nights. It's bumped SNL on my priority list many times over the years and it did last night too. This is my favorite Hitchcock film and I remember visiting Mt. Rushmore for the first time on vacation in 2003 thinking "this isn't nearly as exciting as the movie" and looking for sihlouettes of good guys v. bad guys just before the Mt. Rushmore fireworks. (There weren't any, of course. Sigh.) Anyway, it was a great movie even though I've seen it many times before and they sure don't make them like that anymore. At least not very often.

Miscellaneous

I started a long rant about some issues we're having with Aunt M and her caregivers, but it became as long as a singular blog post, so I'll save it for later this week. Long-story short, my sister and I are beginning to feel like one of the caregivers brings too much of her personal life into her work (no, not the one Dad fired, another one) and is WAY too familiar with mom which means she kind of takes advantage of her. BUT, neither one of us is Aunt M's legal guardian nor do we want that responsibility. Even so, we think our concerns are valid. So, short of getting into a legal wrangle with my parents (who are her guardians) we don't know what to do and we are frustrated. Ah! The joys of the sandwich generation...or at least the generation who is left responsible, but not legally in charge, when the parents go on extended vacation. Good times.

I've got dinner and Golden Globes coming up soon...thanks for reading.

*Word of mouth (not tabloids, but people who know people who know someone...) is that she had a miscarriage early on in their marriage and she was afraid to try again after experiencing that. I don't know if that's true, but it would explain the questionable 'Rachel gets pregnant' storyline on Friends (since those plots are usually sitcom killers).

Friday Flashback (and a surprise!)

When Dave and I were still relatively newlywed, we received what every young LDS couple aspires to (or gets stuck with, depending on your attitude); we were called as co-teachers for the 12-14 year-old Sunday School class. I had an unused degree in secondary ed. sitting on the shelf at home, so I relished the opportunity even though there were twice as many boys as girls in the class AND those boys were crazy excited to be out of Primary. My patience ran a little short with them towards the end of my pregnancy with Natalie, but what I remember now is how gentle each one of them was when they used to hold her as a newborn (AND that they all insisted on holding her).

Time has passed. I've watched all those kids go their own ways: they've graduated high school, served missions, come home, gone to college, gotten married, and one of them even has a precious baby daughter of his own now. One of the few girls, (who was one of my favorites) is currently serving in one of the ward Young Women's presidencies and is a few months away from becoming a mother herself. As a member of the Stake Young Women's presidency, I've visited with her here and there and thought to myself "full circle". She was in my class when I was a young mother-to-be and now it's her turn. How perfect! But God, He has a sense of humor...and sometimes, He doesn't like it when I try to finish a story before He is ready to end it. And so, my friends, it would appear that when I sighed happily in my evening prayers one night about things "coming full circle." God decided to anwer. "Oh my silly daughter," He said. "THAT isn't 'full circle.' THIS is 'full circle.'

I am SO not kidding....

Introducing Baby G #5...due the first week in August. Surprised? So were we!

No New Post Tonight

In case you didn't know, there's a small matter of an OU football game tonight and I'd rather watch than blog...Go SOONERS!

Wordless Wednesday: "Blogspot"

 

Things That are Better Left Unsaid

Most of the time I believe that, by virtue of Christ's Atonement, I truly can repent of all my sins and that the Lord remembers them no more. But sometimes, when faced with certain scenarios in my life that seem to come up over and over and over again; I have to wonder if I'm not going to spend the rest of my life being punished repeatedly for one or two stupid things that happened more than ten years ago, that I have clearly apologized for, and that I would take back in a heartbeat if I could. While the rational part of me knows God doesn't really work that way, the emotional part of me certainly feels like she's being chastised right now.

FYI: I'm pretty sure that having Dave back on the swing shift for the next 90 days has everything to do with my mood tonight. I mean, who doesn't want to spend their nightly migraine time in the company of four kids with no other adult supervision? And, in light of everything that's going on here right now (some of it still unbloggable), I just think that a small break would be nice. I don't expect one will be forthcoming anytime soon, but it would be nice.

Not a Good Track Record So Far...

So...I watched and cheered for Texas Tech in their bowl game and that didn't go so well. I did the same for Oklahoma State and even Alabama. (Mostly so I didn't have to hear a bunch of smug Utah players dub themselves 'God's #1 team'-you know, in light of being no one else's #1 team despite their 13-0 season-which I would feel bad about, if they weren't whining about it.) And now, I'm watching the Fiesta Bowl and trying real hard to root for Texas because loyalty to the Big 12 should be thicker than...something. Anyway, it's OSU 6 and Texas 3 at the start of the 3rd quarter. Somehow, I think we would all feel better if I just stay neutral on Thursday and keep my TV turned off.

Week In Review

Reading

Emma by Jane Austen-

You would think I had done all my Austen/Bronte reading in jr. high like all my other girlfriends did. BUT you would be wrong. I went to B&N yesterday with one of my best friends and we each bought 3 of the 6 Jane Austen books. I'm starting this one later today...

The Tales of Beedle the Bard by J.K. Rowling-

Natalie got this for Christmas and passed it along to me as soon as she was finished. It was quick, but enjoyable reading. Especially all the notes made by Dumbledore. My favorite? (And I'm paraphrasing) 'It was then that Mr. Malfoy began his quest to get me removed from my position as Headmaster and Hogwarts and when I began mine to remove him from the position of Voldemort's favorite Death Eater.' It was a fun book and I highly recommend it to all Harry Potter fans.

Watching

The West Wing-

I finished Season 2 and I am about 8 episodes through Season 3. This is one classy show and I only wish I had discovered it when it was actually on the air. I still love Josh, I'm still pleasantly surprised at how much Rob Lowe's character makes me laugh, and I want to be CJ Cregg when I grow up someday. Now that I have the entire series on DVD, viewing all of it might go more quickly.

At the Movies

The Day the Earth Stood Still-

It had its moments (in particular I was impressed with Jaden Smith), but I still love the original. I wasn't incredibly impressed by Keanu Reeves in this, BUT I didn't expect that I would be.

The Bucket List-

Rob Reiner directing Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman? What's not to love? It was a touching, funny movie without being heavy-handed on the fact that we were watching two men with terminal cancer. If you haven't seen it yet, I would.

On the Town-

Chris and I had lunch/shopping/errand fest yesterday (that ended, as they often do, at Sonic) and tonight Dave and I are going to dinner to celebrate our 12th anniversary. On Sunday. Shame on us. He goes back to the night shift tomorrow and we could get babysitting tonight and only tonight and that is that. Twelve years deserves a nice dinner, don't you think? Happy Anniversary to us!

Just a Little Joke

Our internet was down all day today giving me ample time to take my kids out to use up their gift cards, watch yet more of The West Wing, and wonder what in the world I would write about if I had a connection. I didn't have much, so I'll just leave you with a joke Natalie told in the car:

What's black and white and red all over?

A penguin in an OU jersey!

(And anyone who doubts the possibility of such a scenario clearly did not grow up in the Sooner Nation.)

A Contradiction in Terms

I've been doing a lot of pondering today, and I think that's what I am. Just one big walking contradiction. In the recent past, I've been furious over my church's involvement in Proposition 8 in California; but equally outraged that many Prop 8 opponents have opted to harass temple workers with pointless white powder mailings and occasional physical violence (most temple workers are retired senior citizens, by the way); not to mention vandalism rather than through the appropriate (and, on my part, encouraged) peaceful protesting. (Yes, there has been that too, and I'm heavily in favor of it. But to me, vandalism and bullying are junior high behaviors no matter how frustrating the situation is-and I agree that it IS frustrating.) Because I still feel that Proposition 8 violates the "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" part of the Constitution, I will continue to oppose it. But seeing pictures of spray-painted temples and hearing stories about protesters being physically rough with the senior citizens who work in them have certainly given me much pause to re-think my stance in the last several weeks.

In a related scenario, I am furious at Focus on the Families decision to cave to the pressure of moronic Christian fundamentalist groups and yank a rather inspiring interview with Glenn Beck off of their website. My husband finds my indignation funny because he knows darn well that I'm not a fan of Glenn Beck, dislike Fox News, and will probably never read The Christmas Sweater. But I'm still angry. I find it funny how Focus on the Family wasn't above pooling their resources with the Latter Day Saints (which, according to the protesters, was quite a bit of money and a huge pool of volunteer workers) in order to get Prop 8 passed. But, when it comes to being treated as equals in the Christian community? Not so much. I also think it's worth noting here that it was the Catholic church who was first to rush to our defense in the state of California. Why? Because Catholics have many more centuries thean Latter-Day Saints under their belts when it comes to having their beliefs distorted and their faith mocked by mainstream Christianity. And while, again, I completely disagree with their reasons AND their coalition, I do thank the California Catholic community for having our backs-and I'm not at all surprised they were the first to rush to our defense. I know many amazing people of that religious persuasion and learned a great respect for that religion while serving a mission for my church in Italy. Which is probably not what my church intended when they sent me to Italy as a missionary, but again, I am just one big walking contradiction.

There are many other contradictions I could write about at length, but I'll spare you (for this entry anyway) the details and summarize them like this:

• I'm pro-choice, but I could never have an abortion (granted as a 36 year-old who is married with health insurance and high school and college behind me-it's an easy call for me to make)
• I don't support organized prayer in school, but I hold an organized prayer with my children every morning before we leave the driveway
• I oppose the death penalty, but I believe in the Book of Mormon which endorses it
• I abstain from drugs and alcohol as per my religious beliefs, but I love being with my very Irish family and laugh at their liquored-up antics.
• In fact, I love my fairly pagan family and friends and all of their so-called imperfections. I love being with them and I know (in ways that I will never know from acquaintances at church) that they love me unconditionally as well.

OK, there was no real contradiction in that last one and I'm running out of steam, so it's time to end this. And what better way to end it than with The West Wing quote that inspired it in the first place:

Josh Lyman: In the mean time, remember pluralism. You want to get these people? I mean, you really want to reach in and kill them where they live? Keep accepting more than one idea. Makes them absolutely crazy.

-taken from "Isaac and Ishmael," their Season 3 premiere filmed in just two weeks as a response to the 9/11 terrorist attacks. It was good advice in 2001 and I pray it continues to be so in 2009.