Growing Pains

Natalie's birthday party was today and the real day is coming up on Tuesday. A plus is that her party was one of the easiest ones I've ever thrown. We went to The Warren for a movie and the party package included popcorn and drinks-that the girls could carry and fill by themselves. They could take themselves to the bathroom. They even knew how to behave themselves during the movie which is more than I can say about some of the adults in the theatre today. (The theatre ropes off seats for birthday parties, a lady tried to join us. The ushers dealt with it and, frankly, I was embarrassed for her and her big grown-up tantrum. So much so that I scooted everyone down and around and found her a seat. But I digress.) All I had to do was cut the cake after the party and make sure everyone went home with the right adult.

The flip side to this is that now that we are home tonight decorating our first "real" tree ever (our old tree had a broken base and so many broken lights that we decided to try this out). We have Rudolph-themed ornaments with the Rudolph special playing on TV. And Natalie wants no part in it whatsoever. She is upstairs slamming her door back and forth because her older cousin decided not to come over and because this is the first Christmas that she doesn't believe in Santa anymore and she just doesn't see the point. Which is too bad for her because I still love this show and I will ALWAYS believe in Santa, even though I am quite the Santa's helper each Christmas Eve. I am sad because I still remember so clearly the day all those Rudolph ornaments came in the mail and how my precious little firstborn squealed in delight at the sight of them as she helped me pull them out of the box. She couldn't have been more than a year old back then. And now, she hates everything and everyone including that STOOPID Rudolph show and Mom's STOOPID stuffed animal ornaments.

And that makes me want to cry. Sometimes, I wish those so-called experts on big families were right. One of the things they say is that moms like me keep having babies because we lose interest in our children as they grow older. Of course, it isn't true; but my life would be much easier now if it were. I knew the adolescent years wouldn't be easy, but I didn't know how much every eye roll and door slam would feel like a knife in my heart. At least she had a very good birthday party this afternoon and she usually still likes me. Sigh.